A Feminist Take On The New Royal Family And Other Matters

Image by courtesy of Wikipedia

Feminism, like support for slow growth, skepticism of nuclear power, and, indeed, socialism, is out of fashion. As a not-so-fashionista, I will, therefore, use her as lens to look upon yesterday's Royal Wedding. I should also point out that I don't mind a bit of Gentleman's Relish* in the humour department, although my tastes almost certainly differ from those of our Prime Minister and his deputy.

Yesterday, I had intended a diet free of royal nuptials, but was overcome by a strong desire to sit down in front of the television and do nothing for a couple of hours, as well as the excuse for a glass of alcohol at lunchtime, along with most other Britons. It all turned out to be quite enjoyable : my only criticism being that the equestrian formation which escorted the newly weds back to the palace occasionally looked like something out of a John Wayne film.

This set me wondering what Princess Ann made of it all: the horses, I mean. Now there's a lady that could keep David Cameron on the bit : there would certainly be no "Calm down, Ma'ams" or other speaking out of turn, nor any kind of misbehaviour tolerated amongst the two grey geldings - and their postilions - leading the Coalition Government carriage. She would also, I am sure, bluntly advise the Leader of the Opposition to have the other Mr Ed re-schooled.

Moving on to the matter of succession, I'm glad that this has come up again recently. Personally, I would favour positive discrimination in favour of female offspring, starting with Princess Ann who would succeed her brother Charles as quickly as possible, leaving Zara and her soon to be rugby-player husband as the New Royal Couple. This should continue the reign of stalwart women exemplified in the present Queen Elizabeth.

As to the event of yesterday, surely this was an apotheosis of the spirit of New Labour, but with its prime movers left to be ghosts at the feast, with Ken Livingstone invited instead. It just goes to show that the general matter of transport, and not just getting a wedding party to and from one's palace, may be close to Her Majesty's heart and that the former - and possibly future - London Mayor's introduction of the congestion charge is well regarded in Royal Zones.

* A condiment (? by Royal Appointment)